Terrorists Dig Harry Potter
The camp librarian at the US prison at Guantanamo where numerous, mostly Saudi, captured Al Qaeda are confined reveals that terrorist prisoners at Gitmo prefer to read Harry Potter children's books in their spare time, presumably the time they have free between those torture sessions to which the evil Americans are constantly subjecting them.
Maggie, the camp librarian, says religion tops the reading list for the Muslim nutcases, but "When you get to fiction, definitely Harry Potter." Maggie can only give her first name lest the prisoners make good on their threats to some day kill her and drink her blood.
Some 385 of the worst of the worst remain incarcerated at Gitmo, each of whom can check out books once per week from the camp library, which is immensely popular. The terrorists have run through the first six books of the Potter series. "They're all waiting for number seven to come out," Maggie told reporters. She has pre-ordered the next book, due out later this year, "Harry Potter and the Deathly Hollows."
Tantor stepped into his time & space machine and interviewed prisoners in other notorious prisons from history. In a scientific survey of US servicemen held in the Hanoi Hilton by the North Vietnamese during the Vietnam War, the most common response as to the favorite books checked out from the prison library was: "GET ME THE **** OUT OF HERE BEFORE THEY BEAT ME TO DEATH!" Running a close second was, "I'm laying in my own shit and piss because they locked me up in stocks for two weeks."
Chinese prisoners held in the People's Republic of China held up copies of Mao's little red book and wearily said that was the only book that they ever read or ever wanted to read. Korean prisoners held in the North Korean gulag robotically repeated that they thanked Our Dear Leader Comrade Kim Jong Il for giving them the time to study the dozens of volumes of their leader's speeches and the brilliant advancements of their envied land under his far-seeing philosophy of juche. Their families, locked up with them, also praised Kim for giving them this opportunity to know him better.
When Soviet prisoners from Stalin's show trials were quizzed about their favorite books in prison, the answer given by all was, "Whatever Stalin says. I'll cooperate if you don't kill my family."
Unfortunately, prisoners of Al Qaeda could not be interviewed because they did not live long enough to read anything but the script confessing they were infidels in their snuff videos.