Saturday, September 17, 2005

Flashing For Katrina Relief

Applying the Mardi Gras spirit to hurricane relief, the entrepreneurs at Boobs4BourbonSt are requesting women to anonymously contribute photos of their breasts to their website in order to raise cash, among other things, for Katrina relief. To see this array of mammaries you must first make a minimum contribution of five bucks online to one of the following charities: Bush-Clinton Katrina Fund, Habitat For Humanity, Louisiana Disaster Recovery Foundation, or the Red Cross. After the charity verifies your donation to Boobs4BourbonSt, an account is opened to grant you access to the boob gallery. This is not for those who demand instant gratification.

I marvel at the genius of this idea, which harnesses sex for the greater good. First, it gives a way for seemingly proper but secretly naughty women to flash the world, declaring their sexual selves as they boldly do in those hot little dreams they tell nobody about, safe from social opprobrium in a cloak of anonymity. Second, it taps the vast reservoir of cash trapped in the wallets of the hordes of horny young men who would pay anything for the sight of the unclad tit. Third, it channels all that money to help the storm-tossed unfortunates of Katrina's fury reclaim their lives. Nothing so neatly converts carnal impulse into good deeds as Boobs4BourbonSt. I salute them.

They have enjoyed modest success since their beginning less than two weeks ago. As of yesterday, they have collected $7,734 and forty sets of boobs. That's $193.35 per flash or $96.67 per boob. While perfect in conception, the execution of this philanthropic enterprise has suffered slightly from the misguided contributions of some men who have contributed photos of their man-boobs. Clearly, these are not the boobs we go to see on Bourbon Street come Mardi Gras. That aside, this is a venture which is worthy of the support of American women everywhere, an opportunity to demonstrate their patriotism, a place where every contribution, great and small, is appreciated.

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