Wednesday, September 14, 2005

Dead Cats May Be Fuel Of The Future

Christian Koch, 55, of Saxony, Germany has revealed that he has invented a machine, the "KDV 500", which produces "bio-diesel" fuel from garbage, road kill, and other organic ingredients. Koch claims to have driven his own normal diesel-powered car over a hundred thousand miles on the organically-derived fuel. His company, Alphakat GmbH, claims on its website that the bio-diesel fuel can be manufactured by the KDV 500 for about thirty cents per litre, one fifth the price at German petrol stations. Koch states that tossing about twenty dead cats in the mix could generate enough juice to fill an eleven gallon tank.

According to my calculator, assuming 25 miles per gallon, that's about 13 miles per dead kitty.

As you might expect, there are those who wish to stop the march of progress, in this case, the president of the German Society for the Protection of Animals, Wolfgang Apel, who stoutly opposes cat gas. Cries Wolfgang, "There's no danger for cats and dogs in Germany because this practice is outlawed in Germany. We're going to keep an eye on this case." He might do well to keep on eye on his cats as well, especially as gas prices rocket to the moon and consumers weigh the relative value of Tabby's purring and the purring of the engine of their Honda Civic.

Whodathunk that the answer to our dependence on foreign oil was to be found in the local pet store?


Anonymous Ophelia said...


Wed Sep 14, 04:12:00 PM 2005  
Blogger The Baxter said...

yeeeeeees. very funny!

Wed Sep 14, 05:59:00 PM 2005  
Blogger Tantor said...

Come here, Ophelia, come here, sweetheart. Professor Koch has a yummy yummy snack for you here next to the KDV 500. Be a good kitty.

Wed Sep 14, 06:00:00 PM 2005  

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